Turning your head...

Changing the way you see things can be as easy as turning your head.  After attending two funerals in as many days, I was feeling a bit of "survivor's remorse".  So when I woke up today I wanted to blog about the idea I have for the next Lupus video compilation project.

I was going to ask each "Lupie" that contributed to the "This is what Lupus looks video" (as well as anyone else who wants to contribute to join our growing Lupie/Spoonie community) to share pictures of "what Lupus costs us" or "how have you paid the price for a life with Lupus"-- possibly including pictures of those who have passed of Lupus.  How morbid and sad!  But that is a truth of what Lupus has cost us--and the world--every time another person with Lupus dies.

I thought about the personal price I have paid for "living with Lupus".  Would I post a picture of a baby with a red circle-slash over it, since my Lupus has provided me with extremely low estrogen and I experienced early onset menopause two years ago?  Now, please don't flood my e-mail or comment box with "there is always adoption", because I can't begin to tell you how much money, time, energy and emotion was spent on trying to become a mom that way.   Can you begin to see the negative spiral?  Who has the time?  Not me!  I am living with Lupus and each minute is precious!  So I closed my eyes, turned my head (my neck cracked!) and when I opened my eyes I realized that by shifting my point of view--even just slightly--the next video project could focus on what I call "the joys of Lupus".  How having Lupus in my life makes me appreciate the little things in a constant, yet evolving, way.

Whether you have Lupus or not, maybe all you should do when you feel the negative spiral coming is close your eyes and turn your head.